Old People…Why Don’t You Just Die Already….or At Least Just Stop Driving.

Posted: April 2, 2009 by wakenbake in Uncategorized

I hate the fact that whenever have a really important appointment you need to be at or you are running late for class when, some old person thinks, “Hmmmm now seems like an opportune time to pull out of my drive way and make turns with no turning signal and travel at the insane speed of 20 mph on to the highway.” Seriously sir….you are like 85 years old what the hell are you doing driving and well what the hell are you doing in general.

Here is a list of things that these old fuckers People should consider. * please note that I am really not considering people under the age of 75 to be old when I am writing this list, most of them are still sane and at least drives at 40 mph, it’s the minimum on the highway, but at least they go fast enough for you to pass them.)

1. Leaving the Nursing Home

2. Driving with either an expired license or, more accurately, a close to expired life.

3. If you do not know what year it is…you DEFINITELY should not be driving….young people may ask themselves, “Well certainly they know the current year?”….I work in a Pharmacy….They don’t.

4. If you have a care taker…meaning you brought the nursing home to you…then there is no need for you to leave your house…meaning you driving… They can go out and get what you need…that’s why you are paying them….because I’m sure that you have forgotten why you are paying them.

5. If by some chance you do end up driving somewhere, heaven forbid, use your freakin signal…and remember to turn it off. Only use that shit WHEN you are about to turn not, 3 F***in miles before you turn….that is doing nothing, but building false hope for the person behind you thinking that you’re decrepit ass will get from being in front of them.

So those are just 5 things you old fucks people should consider before pissing off….well everyone.

Oh I almost forgot….Asian people…. you are in the same boat regardless of age…DON’T DRIVE!!!!….or at least take some driving lessons. As far as old Asian people, under no circumstances should be driving…but they still do..and taking it another step further, it’s mainly old Asian women whom I am really concerned about…the WORST DRIVERS ALIVE…and when they drive it’s pretty much guaranteed that they are going to kill someone that day on the road. When ever I see one driving, I immediately try to get as far away from them as possible…like if I can take another route to somewhere I will…my ass will be getting off of an exit and I suggest you do the same or try to drive as far pass them as humanly possible……..Now I love asian people, just not when you drive….when you drive, I literally fear for my F*CKIN life.

Hahaha and I hope that you people had performed some of those pranks…I duct-tapped my friends house.

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